NUMBER ONE IN A SERIES OF ADVICE TO THE SINGLE MAN

Fellas, when you are writing a little profile for yourself to let the world know who you are and maybe to try to get yourself a ladyfriend, or even a manfriend, or whathaveyou, don't like make it all inspirational quotes by someone else.

I mean, are you THAT BORING that you can't think of anything to say that might actually come from who YOU ARE not like what Ghandi said one time. Or friggin Tom Robbins or what everthefuck that guys name is.. That inspirational guy with the bad capped teeth, you know who I'm talking about.

I mean, yes, great, Ghandi and company said some amazing things, worthy of quoting. It's true. But I'm guessing your work as an electrical engineer doesn't really merit having to call on the spirit of Winston Churchill during World War II to get through the day. I'm just guessing..

And also let's face it boys, quoting famous inspirational historical figures in an attempt to get laid is not going to make you look like a good time in the sack.

It's going to make you look like a tool.

Which, well, if the hammer fits....