Hi Everybody!
Lately, I've been riddled with fear and the need to never leave my house due to my working in a school with lots of disturbed type people (aka, please don't shoot me whilst I sit at my desk in the library), and the fact that the weather in New England has been totally f'ed and we're all going to drown in the upswill of water from the polar ice caps. Or perhaps that meteor will just fuck us all and we won't have to worry.
Not leaving my house actually doesn't seem to help, cuz' then I'll just end up choking to death or something horribly ironic (I've seen Six Feet Under, I KNOW HOW IT GOES) and/or die of boredom. Although cable T.V. sure is helpful in that regard. A vacant souless form of entertainment that leaves me empty, but at least I'm not bored!
IRREEEEEGAAAAAAAAHHHHDLESSS... I tell you this story because today, whilst at home from work, sleeping all day (taking a comp day early, IT'S NOT WRONG), and lounging on my bed with a feline (who by the way IS the sweetest most adorable creature known to the earth) I was reading the enviromental issue of the VERY VERY intellectual periodical known as Elle Magazine. I read it for the articles. Seriously.
As someone who has never watched an Inconvenient Truth because, I KNOW we're fucked and I don't need to feel more panicky about it (see above paragraph concerning not leaving the house) I found out about some stuff that makes me feel a little less hopeless and unable to help make change. I do all the good stuff, I recycle like EVERYTHING, I have those compact flourescent (sp?) bulbs, turn off power strips, wash clothes in cold water, take the T to work (usually) ETC, ETC. However, I don't have a hybrid car, cuz' my car was FREE and will last forever if I have anything to say about it and my place needs new windows. It's true.
So, I went to this place (terrapass.com) and paid them some money and they are going to offset my emissions. It helps make me feel less like an asshole. And is surprisingly inexpensive. So, if you are an asshole with an SUV (perhaps you neeeeeeed it to haul all your booty from Bloomingdales home) or even an asshole with a smaller car, at least you can do this and put a sticker on it, to show folks maybe you aren't as MUCH of an asshole. Although if you own a Hummer, pretty much everyone is going to think you're an asshole. With a small dick. It's a given. At least in Massachusetts. That should be part of their marketing campaign! "Worried the world knows about your huge cock? Is having people stare at your package instead of into your eyes getting you down? Buy a Hummer, and the excited chatter about your "dick stick" will suddenly stop! Stop those rumors, let them know you're tiny!" Anyway, I digress...
Also a cool place to go is here: http://www.greendimes.com/ if you pay them a fee a year (which isn't alot) they will stop a ton of your junk mail. I LOVE this idea, because junk mail sucks and I sure as shit don't need another Chadwicks of Boston catalog. No, I sure don't.
So, now I just need to get me a kevlar (sp?) suit and I'll be allllll set. Or a bear suit.
Lately, I've been riddled with fear and the need to never leave my house due to my working in a school with lots of disturbed type people (aka, please don't shoot me whilst I sit at my desk in the library), and the fact that the weather in New England has been totally f'ed and we're all going to drown in the upswill of water from the polar ice caps. Or perhaps that meteor will just fuck us all and we won't have to worry.
Not leaving my house actually doesn't seem to help, cuz' then I'll just end up choking to death or something horribly ironic (I've seen Six Feet Under, I KNOW HOW IT GOES) and/or die of boredom. Although cable T.V. sure is helpful in that regard. A vacant souless form of entertainment that leaves me empty, but at least I'm not bored!
IRREEEEEGAAAAAAAAHHHHDLESSS... I tell you this story because today, whilst at home from work, sleeping all day (taking a comp day early, IT'S NOT WRONG), and lounging on my bed with a feline (who by the way IS the sweetest most adorable creature known to the earth) I was reading the enviromental issue of the VERY VERY intellectual periodical known as Elle Magazine. I read it for the articles. Seriously.
As someone who has never watched an Inconvenient Truth because, I KNOW we're fucked and I don't need to feel more panicky about it (see above paragraph concerning not leaving the house) I found out about some stuff that makes me feel a little less hopeless and unable to help make change. I do all the good stuff, I recycle like EVERYTHING, I have those compact flourescent (sp?) bulbs, turn off power strips, wash clothes in cold water, take the T to work (usually) ETC, ETC. However, I don't have a hybrid car, cuz' my car was FREE and will last forever if I have anything to say about it and my place needs new windows. It's true.
So, I went to this place (terrapass.com) and paid them some money and they are going to offset my emissions. It helps make me feel less like an asshole. And is surprisingly inexpensive. So, if you are an asshole with an SUV (perhaps you neeeeeeed it to haul all your booty from Bloomingdales home) or even an asshole with a smaller car, at least you can do this and put a sticker on it, to show folks maybe you aren't as MUCH of an asshole. Although if you own a Hummer, pretty much everyone is going to think you're an asshole. With a small dick. It's a given. At least in Massachusetts. That should be part of their marketing campaign! "Worried the world knows about your huge cock? Is having people stare at your package instead of into your eyes getting you down? Buy a Hummer, and the excited chatter about your "dick stick" will suddenly stop! Stop those rumors, let them know you're tiny!" Anyway, I digress...
Also a cool place to go is here: http://www.greendimes.com/ if you pay them a fee a year (which isn't alot) they will stop a ton of your junk mail. I LOVE this idea, because junk mail sucks and I sure as shit don't need another Chadwicks of Boston catalog. No, I sure don't.
So, now I just need to get me a kevlar (sp?) suit and I'll be allllll set. Or a bear suit.
posted by twicksie at
6:21 PM
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