Ok, so, I um.. hugged one of my clients the other day.

And when I say 'client' I don't mean I'm a hooker who calls her 'johns' clients. Or a therapist or something where perhaps hugging said client might be considered somewhat normal.

No, no, I work for a website company, managing projects with clients in higher education, or like pharmaceutical companies. Not really 'hugging appropriate'.

ugh.

So, yes, I got a little over zealous and some hugging occured. But let me say IN MY DEFENSE that the *other* client contact we saw that day, very OBVIOUSLY went in for the hug with me. I had NOTHING to do with that hug. I just awkwardly received it.

Oh, but also let me say that this is in Long Island. Not the most fuzzy warm place. Lord help me.

At the end of our meeting, the client contact in question (not the original hugger) came at me with a hand shake, which I gladly returned. Then, like in some slow motion horror sequence (maybe the prom scene in Carrie? maybe?) I felt the client coming at me in a manner that I interpreted to mean that she too was going for the hug.

It was an awkward hug initiation, but I felt that it had been made. So in I went for the hug return! "Come 'er you big lug!" Ok, I didn't really say that, but that was the 'tone' of my return hug. As in, DON'T BE SHY, LET'S GET THIS HUG ON!

And then, just as quickly as the awkward hug situation began, I realized that, in fact, this client was perhaps just going to try to get past me to the door to leave. And, in reality, this motion towards me was not a pre-hug stance, but a motion to leave the room.

OH MY GOD.

I just fucking HUGGED THE FUCKING CLIENT.

These were the thoughts running through my head. I have just SEXUALLY HARASSED MY CLIENT OF THE SAME SEX AND SHE WILL BE FIRING US, AND ALSO SUING ME SHORTLY. Not only sexual harassment, but GAY sexual harassment. Jesus help me.

As it became clear that the hug was unsolicited and perhaps FORCED upon her by me, I busied myself with fixing a sandwich and frantically tried some damage control.

"Oohh, yes, sorry 'bout that! I was just in the South and got used to being really friendly. Heh heh... heh..."

Yeah, I'm pretty sure she wasn't buying it.

Again, IN MY DEFENSE, if the first client contact hadn't busted out with the hug, I would have NEVER thought she was also looking for some lovin', huggin' style. I mean, maybe it was like some european kiss/kiss situation. Maybe?

The rest of our meeting, albeit brief, was spent by me going over the whole horrifying scene in my head and trying desperately not to bust out laughing because I was so mortified.

When I got outside away from client earshot I mentioned my horror to my co-workers who seemed very non-plussed about the whole thing. Apparently the hug that felt like a bad dismount on a bad first date didn't seem *too* weird to the other people there.

However, later, I was reminded never to show my weakness to one of my co-workers when my boss came up to me (who had not been at the meeting) and said 'Hey there huggy-bear!'

UGH.

Yeah, apparently, he found the story sooooo funny he decided to tell the entire management team about my faux pas. CEO, my boss, all of them. Nice.

I haven't stopped blushing for almost a week now.

Let the circle be unbroken, the humilation is complete.

I think I need a hug.